As i sit back on this last day in 2012, i reflect on this past year and see that this past year was a year of change. In January, i took a leave of absence from doing A\V duties at church, which i had previous done for 6 yrs, and it was time i needed a break. In February, i turned 34 years old, but also was looking forward to Valentine’s Day for once as I had a date with my lovely girlfriend whom later that evening i told her i loved her and she told me in returned that she loved me. It was also during Jan\Feb that we met the parents for the first time. In April, i took Kate to her first MLB game in STL with very short notice, and then three days later we went back to STL for a banquet that was for Kate’s work and where she was nominated, but did not win, corporate employee for the year award.

May was our 6 month anniversary of dating, so thanks to friends of Kate’s, we ate dinner at the Quincy Country Club. July was loads of fun as it was Kate’s birthday and the both of us took the day off and just had a fun day. Went to STL on two different occasions for a baseball game and a Rascal Flatts concert. We also went to the community theater to watch Oklahoma.

September was a full month. Started out the month with ending the summer with Labor Day in STL. Originally we were going to go to a game as i had free tickets in the upper deck. However a day prior i told Kate that instead of going to the game, we would just spent the day doing fun stuff in STL. We went up in the Arch, walked around and had lunch downtown, and went shopping. Two weeks later, her parents came up for the weekend. While Kate and her mom were at a Beth Moore simulcast, her dad and i spent a few hours at the IL Vets Home War Museum, as it’s one of his favorite places to go. Also it was during the day we had a little “chat” about his daughter…….. . At the end of the day i had his blessing to ask Kate to marry me. Then the following day on Sunday, my parents came down and all of us went to church together, and then went out for lunch. That was the first time parents met each other for the first time.

Then came time to figure out the proposal. Initially i would ask her on the day we met for the first time, which was during the Young Life fall banquet in October, or when we started dating, which was in November. However she had two dates in her mind that she thought i would ask her, so i threw both dates out. I then decided to do something that was two-fold: One was to do something that would take me out of my comfort zone and Two – she would never expect it! A month of planning, organizing, and help from a lot of people November 2nd came and the proposal was perfect and she did not expect me to do what i did. Had a friend of mine who is the A\V specialist at John Wood help with the video taping it. The video is uploaded to Facebook, and we have several copies on DVD since we had to go and make some changes. The proposal ended up turning into an official John Wood project as the President wanted to show it to the Board of Trustees, and then later to the rest of the staff and faculty. So having a DVD ready was critical. Both Kate and I had no clue this little thing would turn into such a big production. Not to mention it was listed in the paper as the husband of the HR Director works for the Herald Whig and said that he would put it in the local section called “Word on the Street”.

November and December was also a little hard as the both of us decided that we needed to find a church that we could call “our church”. With much prayer, the decision was made, and found a church that we could call “our own”, and not “Seth’s church” or “Kate’s church”. Way back early on in our relationship, we knew one day we would have to decide on our church home. So, with that said, we have been going to Lighthouse Baptist for the last month or so and feel like that is where God wants us to be. Before we went there for the first time, i prayed to God and ask for wisdom and guidance on whether Lighthouse is the right place or not. Within probably 10 minutes after stepping foot into the church, i knew that this was the place. However to be sure, we went back the following week, and we both knew that this was the place for us.

Finally, as the year comes to an end, we have finalized a date, location, rings, and a few other big items for our wedding as we want to get it to the point where we can focus totally on premarital counseling and not be worried about certain things going into 2013

All of this was through God and God alone. I know now that God’s plan for my life is far greater and better than the plan i had for my life. I am looking forward to what God has planned for my life, and the life that Kate and i will as we start a new life together!

To God be the Glory, great things He has done!

The following is an email i sent to a few people at church a few weeks ago concerning my second “job” and the need to take a sabbatical.

As some of you may know, I have been assisting with the Audio\Video for the last six years here at Calvary. I enjoy doing it, but there are times that I wish I could just take a week off here and there. However trying to find a replacement has always been difficult. I have also put up with a lot when it came with several different people telling me click sooner, click later, change this word\that word, etc when I was also trying to deal with other technical issues at the exact same time. It got to the point where I came close of going off on them or just simply walking away and let somebody else deal with it on several occasions. However, I worked through it. We tried to get people that would be interested in helping us or people who we thought that was reliable enough to show up every week. That never happened.

If I remember correctly, it was sometime in early summer that I had a conversation with a friend and I was sharing some things, and he said that I have been going to church, but not going to church. When he said that, I pondered that for a few seconds and thought he was 100% correct. For the last six years I have been going to church, but not going to church. I have been going to the building, but I have not been participating in the morning worship. It was then I started to plan my exit strategy and take a leave of absence so I can get back into why we come to church in the first place and that is to worship God and become more like Christ. I came to realization that a break is necessary for me to keep my sanity before one – I snap at something very small and insignificant; two – I had enough and just walk out one Sunday morning (it has crossed my mind several times), and three – I need to get back to going to church.

Over the last few months, I have planned for my exit and there have been a couple of speed bumps, however I have kept my word and stood my ground when others have tried to tell me what needs to be done. I have also realized that those first few weeks of me not assisting with the A\V will be the most difficult. Knowing the person that I am, and how I love technology, it will be very hard for me just to sit in the pew and not think about the person that is taking my place, and how they should have click sooner or later, and all the other things I have done over the last six years that have become second nature for me and that i have perfected. So, with that said, I have told the associate pastor this, and I’m telling you this now, that for those first few weeks, I will not be on the premises of Calvary, which includes Sunday School. I will come back to Calvary, as it is my church, but please understand that it is better for me not to be there at all. My last Sunday will be January 15th. Even when I do come back, it will still be tough, but probably not as tough as those first few weeks. I am planning to take one year off, and hope that when I do come back they will have set up a rotation so I won’t be the sole person who runs the video portion.

Some may think that I am taking a break because of Kate, and I will tell you now, it has nothing to do with her at all. This decision came long before the two of us met and starting dating. Yes, I will probably go to Columbus Road, where she attends, and we will even go to Pittsfield to see the church that both Calvary and Columbus Road has invested a lot into the last couple of years. But this was my decision that should have happened a long time ago!

I am telling you this now so you won’t be caught off guard when I don’t show up at church for a few weeks. I do appreciate your friendship over the years, and hope that you will understand the reason for my decision in this matter. If you have any questions, please let me know!

Sincerely,

Seth Brammer

#1 – The Butt Kisser – this is the person that will allow “the emperor to have no clothes.” They think EVERYTHING you say is a “great idea boss” and NEVER push back. (This person will kiss your butt until they have the opportunity to do it for someone who they feel is more important than you…then they will take their lips elsewhere!)

#2 – The Philosophical Expert – this is the person who has an “innovative philosophy” that will change the game…but has been unwilling to attempt it. Rather than actually do what they propose they usually write a book about it and challenge others to do it. (Such as…the dude who writes a book on how to plant a church but has never actually planted a church!)

#3 – The “Devil’s Advocate” – I’ve said it before, I will say it again…the devil doesn’t need a freakin’ advocate…and no one on your team should feel the need to serve him! If there is someone that ALWAYS finds a dark cloud on every bright day…beware. Becoming preoccupied with the pessimist will always drain your passion!

#4 – The Over Promiser – There are really great people in this world who just can’t say no…so they will over promise, not because they are evil but because they often feel guilty when they say no. If you see someone promising everyone they will do everything then I can promise that the quality of that work will probably amount to nothing…OR…they will do a great job and burn out in ministry.

#5 – The “People’s Advocate” – When the person approaches you and says, “Hey man, A LOT OF PEOPLE ARE SAYING…” BEWARE! Because…in reality a lot of people are probably NOT saying anything…he and two or three of his friends are saying! If a person isn’t willing to give names they should simply be ignored.

#6 – The “Guilt Trip Guide” – This is the person who always tries to make you feel horrible that you are not as passionate about their ministry as they are. Reality is that God allows different things to fire people up!

#7 – The Incomplete Information Guide – This is the person who shares what’s going on with you…but actually doesn’t know what is going on…so they make up the parts of the story they are unsure about as they go. Listening to this person will always get you to a place that isn’t good!

#8 – The “Gotta Know” Person – This is the person that always has to know everything…and if they don’t they sulk and pout. This person will often begin to invite themselves to meetings and literally suck the life right out of the room. Make sure the right people know the right information…but never feel obligated to invite people to be in a meeting because they just always want to be in the know.

#9 – The “Yeah, But…” Person – ALWAYS beware of the person who, when you or someone else is talking about what God is doing in another church or ministry ALWAYS says, “yeah…but I know someone who told me what is REALLY going on there…” The person who always has something negative to say about other people and ministries is saying negative things about you and your church behind your back! People who can’t celebrate what God is doing elsewhere can’t be trusted.

#10 – The Passionless Person – I told our staff recently that we can no longer afford to have passionless people in prominent positions. It’s not my job to fire people up…it’s my job to keep pouring gasoline on the fire that should already be there. The teams we serve with are either passion suckers or difference makers!

#11 –The “That’s Not My Job” Person – When a person replies in this manner when asked to do something then you can bet your last Bible that they are not fully sold out to the vision of your ministry!